The Gin Fiend doesn't know fuck-all about sports. I had to go with the next best thing.
Commercial Highlights:
- Bud Light: One of the first ones out there, where the pilot jumps after the beer. Simple. Funny. Short and sweet. Thumb up.
- Quiznos: That talking baby. Slightly humorous the first time we saw it. Incredibly annoying the 98th time we saw it. Thumb down.
- Fed-Ex: 10 things needed in a Super Bowl Commercial. Groin kicks, dancing grizzly bears, and hot girls. Thumb up.
- Subway: Two guys in a car eating sandwiches. This does absolutely nothing for me. Way to blow your advertising bucks, guys. Thumb down.
- GoDaddy.Com: Hot Girl on a spoof of C-Span. Hilarious. Thumb up.
- Diet Pepsi: P-Diddy gets a ride in a Diet Pepsi truck, causing everybody to drive one. Thumb up on the monster Diet Pepsi truck.
- Regular Pepsi: Thumb up on the beautiful girls. Thumb down on the terrible, terrible commercial.
- Lays: Random nonsense getting thrown over a fence, including MC Hammer. Awesome. Thumb up.
- U.S.Cellular: Some guy shoving his pelvis at people. Plus, it's an old commercial. Thumb down. Way down.
- Tobasco Sauce: Hot Sauce. Hot Girl. Thumb Up.
- Nascar: Pirates? Thumb up. Nascar? Thumb down. Nice try.
- CareerBuilder.Com: A normal guy working with a bunch of monkeys. We've all had days like this. Did I mention Monkeys? Thumb up.
- Anheuser-Busch: Airport travelers giving a standing ovation to American soldiers. Well done. Thumb Up.
- American Mortgage: 'Don't Judge Too Quickly' Situational comedy, Thumb up. The guy looking like an idiot every time (as opposed to the girl) Thumb down.
- Hyundai: Ugly pickup truck, thumb down. Big-Ass Alaskan belt buckle, thumb up.
- Bubblicious: LeBron James walks out acting like LeBron James. This is a commercial for Bubblicious. ?! Thumb gouging out eyeballs.
Potential Things That We Should've Seen, But Didn't:
- The Eagles winning the Super Bowl.
- Paul McCartney's Breast.
- Team captains beating the ever-loving crap out of that little kid for such a bullshit coin toss.
- Paul McCartney's Drummer's Breast.
- Bush vs. Clinton Celebrity Deathmatch.
Why yes, Mr. Fiend, I will have an extra olive with that.
All the best.
Editor's note: First of all, I hope Klondike's not too pissed that I blatantly stole this from the message board. Second, I'll be back tomorrow with a Weekend in Review, and later this week with MLB Preview #2.