Top Eleven Ways Baseball Is Just Like Chess, In Increasing Order Of How Lame I Think It Is

by Klondike, 2007 KankaNation Laetare Recipient

Editor's Note: This is the second in what Klondike hopes is a monthly series of his opinions on sports. Click on the "If Klondike ran sports" label at the end of this article to check out the complete collection.

#11: You can sacrifice players.

#10: People are constantly trying to figure out how to do things better with computers.

#9: To get the really good players, you usually have to go to a foreign country.

#8: It takes many individual, specialized "players" to play on each team.

#7: You don't need the body of an athlete in order to play the game professionally.

#6: You can always find a fan of the game that can recite all sorts of esoteric statistics that nobody cares about.

#5: Steroid usage is frowned upon.

#4: You can only travel in certain paths to get from square to square.

#3: Cheerleaders.

#2: Games can be played for as long as it takes, however excruciatingly long that might be.

#1: Nobody will play when it's raining.